You Only See What You Want To See

You don’t see me

For the me I am

Because you’re too busy

Judging what you don’t know

It hurts but I try not to let it show

 

 

Everyday I’m hiding for my safety

Hoping I won’t get locked up

For just being different

All because I survived

All because I didn’t want to die

 

 

But it doesn’t matter

That I was protecting myself

Because you don’t care

And would rather stay unaware

Instead of see the truth

That’s I’m beautiful as I am

Not damaged, not broken

These words are left unspoken

Because you don’t want to hear me

Because you don’t want to see me

You only see what you want to see

Instead of accepting me for me

 

Written by : Ashley

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Haunted In My Dreams

You wake in my mind
Every time I lay down at night.
Your face it haunts me
And never lets me forget
The way you made me feel.
It will seem so real.

But then the day begins
And I’m left helpless again.
Wondering where you are
Yet trying to leave you behind.

I’m going out of my head
Trying to get you out of my bed.
Maybe it’s time I turn out the light.
I know I’ll have to put up a fight.

But maybe I don’t want you to go.
I’m conflicted more than you know
But I feel that you don’t care at all
You never did as you watched me fall.

You pretend that I don’t exist.
It hurts to know that I’m not missed.
But I have to move on from this pain
Because I know there’s nothing to gain.

I’m just holding on to a lie.
I’m hoping this is goodbye
But I know that you’ll be back soon
As soon as I go to my room
And lay my head down on my pillow
Closing my eyes and wishing you away.
If only you wouldn’t stay
Then I’d have a peace of mind the next day.

 

Written by : Violet

Falling Between The Cracks

Switching modes

So caught in between.

 

Feeling myself slipping

Between the cracks

Of those before me.

 

Losing track of who I am

Is easy when I

Never stay the same.

 

Locked up in a hell

That keeps me hooked

With desires hard to ignore.

 

Falling in and out

Hoping to stay here

For just a little longer.

 

But then I’m gone again

And when I come back

I never feel quite right.

 

Not that I ever really have

In this game that never ends.

 

Tired of being played

And never really having a voice

To call my own.

 

It’s what I’m used to though

And it brings me a comfort

That I know is toxic.

 

Giving me a false sense of security.

Strapping me down to the lies

That keep me alive.

 

Written by : Kristin

 

Knocked Up

sweaty hands
make sweaty babies
the grease and grime
of all that is untouched

pour me a cup
of your undying love
so I can pretend
that you are real

just a moment
of pleasure in the backseat
could result in the unwanted

i’ll be that child
who you would later deny
and put up for sale

time will pass
and you will push me away
because my existence
haunts you everyday

that man raped your soul
now you take it out on me
but I am just an innocent
who happened to drop in
on that day of horror

this is not my fault
but I will always feel like it is
as I scream and cry
these bloody tears
no one will ever hear me

they are too wrapped up
in themselves to even care
so I jump off this bridge
ready to fly with eyes closed
never to be seen again

 

Written by : Violet

Nothing More To Give

They walk on eggshells around me
So they don’t disturb my weak heart
That jumps at the slightest sign of danger.

I know that I’m a burden
Even though they constantly reassure me.
I know I take up too much space
And I’m only seen as a pretty face.

Just admit you don’t want me around
And I’ll learn to never make a sound
So we don’t keep wasting time here
Pretending that there’s something more I can give.

Keep Going

There’s nothing but madness
Inside this life that I lead
But I still find myself waiting
In the forest of dreams

Time is never my friend
But I still treat it like a god
Because I know that in the end
It will be the only thing I got

My eyes they bleed
My throat is sore
My face is flushed
But I keep on searching
For something more

It’s never enough
But the words keep spilling out
Is it because I have hope?
Or is it because I can’t cope?

I guess it doesn’t really matter
As long as I expose every vulnerable piece
Even if I feel weak
Afraid to be seen